labay

Walking Da Bush

In Caribbean American interest, Caribbean interest, Humor on December 3, 2008 at 1:05 am

Boy, it’s always interesting taking a stroll along the contiguous Brooklyn corridor known as Flatbush. To fully get my point, the ambling has to take place in the West Indian section, which starts roughly at Empire Boulevard and ends around the Flatbush Junction near Brooklyn College. Arm yourself now, ladies. You’ll be more peeved than entertained.  Oh, the gawking and inevitable catcalls!

When I recently took a walk down the strip, err, I mean avenue I was reminded with each ogle, with each “mm,mm”, with each “baby girl or gal,” depending on who’s talking, with every pendulous tongue, and craned neck that when it comes to the bare essentials of who I am, I’m meat. I’m fresh meat meant to be rubbed, kneaded, then eaten like, well, meat.

Put on your bib. Chomp, chomp. 

I felt like a modern day Red Riding Hood and I was simply trying to make my way to Staples. There was not one two-legged wolf but a pack of em’, EVERYWHERE – staring and saying things like “Hey, sexy.”

*Pssss…for Caribbean brothas of Da Bush, “sexy” is a favorite adjective when accosting unsuspecting female pedestrians.*

One brotha even showed me his fancy footwork as he suddenly broke into dance in the middle of the sidewalk. Reggae music blared from speakers inside a store as I purposely took longer steps to quickly pass this fool who reminded me of a jellybean with legs. That guy should apply for a job as a sport mascot or consider doing Fruit of the Loom commercials. Just my two cents.

Fool of the Da Bush looked like this fella

Fool of the Da Bush looked like this fella

To my Caribbean brothas representing Da Bush, I give you a high-five. Thanks for welcoming me back home. It feels great to know that in spite of women advancements and Bob Marley’s indelible songs of harmony, love, and respect for women, that you, Caribbean brothas of Da Bush, have not wavered from your lecherous ways. – MJ

P.S. I’m totally aware that Bob Marley had his own issues with the ladies. But Caribbean brothas of Da Bush, you’re supposed to grow from his wayward ways. Heed his words of wisdom. Do as he sang, not as he lived.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: