Gosh, is it me or are things feeling a tad more somber than normal? I’m dragging. Need more coffee.
It’s been a pretty funky news week with the Connecticut chimp mauling, the ensuing New York Post racist cartoon, the jacked-up Rihanna photo, and the GOP’s seemingly never-ending whining about all things President Obama. Need a picker upper.
Um…Oh, I know…I’ll get a little dose of humor from The Onion. It’ll help me wile away the hours and get through this day.
Here’s what I dug up.
Vodpod videos no longer available.
And now read except from a mock Onion article.
ORLANDO, FL-Since leaping over Orlando Magic center Dwight Howard to claim his second NBA dunk title Saturday, 5-foot-9 New York Knicks guard Nate Robinson has apparently dedicated himself to the sole task of jumping over Howard as the 7-footer goes about his daily life.
According to Howard, Robinson bounded over him roughly two dozen times on Tuesday alone, most notably while the All-Star center was putting gas in his car, as he was standing in the checkout line at the grocery store, immediately after he woke up in the morning, two minutes later when he was taking a shower, and right afterward as he began to shave.
“I can’t do anything without that guy jumping over me,” said Howard, who glanced over his shoulder every few seconds during his press conference Wednesday. “He’s everywhere. When I took my mom to her doctor’s appointment last Monday, at church communion, and every time I get off my couch to put in a new DVD. And I watch a lot of DVDs.”
“Today I thought it was finally over because Nate hadn’t jumped over me once-not at the cleaners, the skate park, the gym, anywhere,” Howard said. “Then I sat down to a romantic dinner with my girlfriend and as soon as I stood up to light the candles, he comes flying in, breaks the dishware, and gets baked ziti all over the carpet.”
“It’s upsetting,” Howard continued. “But you know what angers me most? It’s that he really isn’t jumping over me. His crotch is barely clearing the top of my head, and he is putting his left arm on my back for an extra boost. You people are seeing that, right? You’re seeing that I need to lean down so he doesn’t bang his waist into the back of my head and fall to the ground and embarrass himself in front of everybody? You saw that I dunked on a fucking 12-foot hoop, right?”
Chuckle, chuckle.
Funny stuff. Happy Friday! – MJ
LaBay - a Caribbean Blog 